And so it is...

VENTIng

Tue, 29 May 2012 15:58:03 -0400

It’s been AGES since I’ve gotten on tumblr but I need to do some major venting. I’m in a weird place….one that is unfamiliar territory for me, and I’m not sure how to navigate these waters.

I think about him every now and then, and all that comes to my mind is that I’m grateful…to him…for him…for what he and I went through. It got me here. It got me to now. And I’m happy—-for the most part. I live in my favorite Texas town, I have a job that I love, and I’m free. Free from my parents, free from the comfort of home, free from things I thought I needed in order to be happy.

So what could I possibly have to complain about? It’s so ridiculous that I hate to admit that it bothers me. My heart and mind finally agree that I don’t want/need to be with a guy right now. I’m totally ok with that realization—-I welcome it with open arms and it has proved to be very gratifying. BUT, my drunken self refuses to accept this lifestyle. Drunk me LOVES to drunk dial, drunk text, drunk make-out, yada-yada-yada. It has gotten me into nothing but trouble. For the most part, I have been able to do successful damage control, and my ‘victims’ have been extremely understanding and non-judgmental.

I wish that were the case for my most recent encounter. I can’t shake him off my tail. I’ve been consistently blunt about not wanting any type of relationship and I’ve been avoiding texts/calls hoping to solidify how I feel about it. NOT WORKING! Instead, it seems to have the adverse effect and he’s striking back with more tenacity. I’d understand his determination if we had spent more time together…but it was 3 days in a 3 week span….wtf! Now, I love myself and I know I have a lot to offer, but give me a break—-it takes MUCH LONGER for my awesomeness to have that kind of effect on someone.

50% of me is annoyed that I’m having todealwith this, and the other 50% still has my fishing rod hanging over the edge of the boat, hoping to hook a catch that makes me as crazy as homeboy (obvi, I don’t want to be this kind of cray with this particular guy….it would have to be someone in my zip code). The gym proves to be a pretty good water hole…but again, I don’t want anything serious—-unless I meet someone who makes me want something serious.

ARGH! This effing dilemma! And I’m sick of everyone getting engaged and pregnant and married. Been there, done that—-grow up! Enjoy life! There’s so much life to experience before you decide to share it with someone else. Granted, not all stories are the same and I hope that no one ever has to live my story for themselves. Then again, my story—although sad—led me to happiness. Catch-22!

Ok, I feel better. Not really. I feel exactly the same. I wish my girls were here—to get drunk with and watch reality tv and eat everything I’m not supposed to be eating.

Obsessed...

Thu, 09 Feb 2012 21:54:21 -0500

Obsessed...:

…with this song!

LOL

Thu, 09 Feb 2012 15:23:47 -0500

LOL

Noel Kahn!!!

Tue, 31 Jan 2012 02:24:00 -0500

Noel Kahn!!!

Pretty Little Liars was intenseeeee last night!

Tue, 31 Jan 2012 02:23:20 -0500

Pretty Little Liars was intenseeeee last night!

Photo

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 20:48:52 -0500

Photo

Sun, 29 Jan 2012 20:37:39 -0500

A Day to Remember!

Tue, 17 Jan 2012 21:58:54 -0500

A Day to Remember!

"Tom: What happens if you fall in love? Summer: Well, you don’t believe that, do you? Tom:..."

Sat, 14 Jan 2012 21:41:00 -0500

“Tom: What happens if you fall in love?
Summer: Well, you don’t believe that, do you?
Tom: It’s love. It’s not Santa Claus.”

- 500 Days of Summer (via sensiblywreckless)

My heart remains with you…. #college station #home #must...

Thu, 05 Jan 2012 11:05:45 -0500

My heart remains with you….

#college station #home #must go back

shimmmeny shammoodle!

Tue, 27 Dec 2011 22:23:50 -0500

shimmmeny shammoodle!

Oh how I miss you so!

Sun, 11 Dec 2011 23:34:38 -0500

Oh how I miss you so!

So I’ll wait upon you now with my hands released to...

Tue, 29 Nov 2011 10:56:06 -0500

So I’ll wait upon you now with my hands released to you

where a little faith’s enough to see mountains lift and move,

and I’ll wait upon you now dedicated to your will

to this love that will remain—-a love that never fails.

They say that when you are in the process of doing God’s...

Mon, 07 Nov 2011 23:14:44 -0500

They say that when you are in the process of doing God’s work, the devil will attack you more so than usual. I firmly believe that this is true. I dreamt about EJ last night, and it was an absolutely beautiful dream. It reminded me of those hope filled memories we shared while we were together. While I wish him nothing but the best, I still prefer not to dream about him. I know this was the devil’s way of trying to catch me off guard…and it did. It made me think about him for the majority of the day—-something I haven’t done in a while. Instead, I should be thinking about all the great things that this weekend will bring. Again, the devil attacked. This time, through Tito. A while ago, he posted a status that said, ”Looking for a date to take to dinner @ La Posada- Tack Room. Let me know why I should take you….haha!” I had decided a few weeks ago that I didn’t want to pursue anything with him, because certain things had happened and I wasn’t willing to sacrifice what I deserve, to be with him. Even though I’m happy with my decision, it still stings a little to see him advertising himself on Facebook. It’s not that I miss him, but it’s more the fact that during our 2 months of ‘talking,’ we never went on an actual “real” date. It’s annoying more than anything. But again, it shouldn’t bother me because I lost the desire to want to be with him. The devil is sneaky in his ways, but I refuse to let him get to me anymore. I’m going to keep focusing on my faith, and the devil can suck it.

The Pros and Cons of Monday

Mon, 07 Nov 2011 20:25:26 -0500

philolzophy:

Pros:

Congratulations, you lived through the weekend.

Cons:

It’s not the weekend any more.

Your apartment probably looks like a crime scene.

It’s definitely time to shower.

Don’t have an excuse to day drink any more.

You spent all your money.

Other depressing cliches about Monday morning.

Happy Monday, y’all!

OMG!!!! this has got to be one of the most adorable things...

Sun, 06 Nov 2011 23:57:53 -0500

OMG!!!! this has got to be one of the most adorable things I’ve ever seen!

#halloween is for dogs too

wellthatsadorable:

And the winner of the costume contest is Brittany’s dog Momo! I received so many amazing entries, but finally chose Momo because it looks like you just dressed up an Ewok as an Ewok for Halloween, and I can’t stop laughing. Look at that face! I’m dying! This has been the hardest decision of my life (maybe), and I will be sharing some of the other amazing entries soon. Hurrah for Halloween!

azizisbored: Just saw this. Pretty solid Halloween...

Wed, 02 Nov 2011 16:46:11 -0400

azizisbored:

Just saw this. Pretty solid Halloween move.

bemore:

how i am treating trick-or-treaters this year

Yes!

I pray. I pray because it changes me. I pray because without His love, my life wouldn’t make...

Tue, 01 Nov 2011 11:26:21 -0400

I pray. I pray because it changes me. I pray because without His love, my life wouldn’t make sense.

wellthatsadorable: Ughhh I can’t handle it. The picture alone...

Wed, 26 Oct 2011 16:50:38 -0400

wellthatsadorable:

Ughhh I can’t handle it. The picture alone is ADORABLE, but can you imagine this little guy hopping around and wagging that tail and biting at that soccer ball and crawling in your lap and hugging you and UGGHHHHH I can’t DEAL.

(Thanks to Spike F. for the pic from sbnation!)

O M G!

It’s about that time again :D #Tiffany & Co...

Tue, 25 Oct 2011 22:45:20 -0400

It’s about that time again :D

#Tiffany & Co #Splurge #Treat Yo Self!